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Submitted on
June 22, 2012
File Size
805 bytes


33 (who?)


Creative Commons License
Some rights reserved. This work is licensed under a
Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 License.
Oh look at her with ivory eyes,
Striking the velvet veil of starless skies.
Is she a draconian demon ready to bring ruin,
Upon those that ripped her life apart,
With every pulsating beat of her black-heart?

Oh look at her with crimson claws,
Maiming the satin skin of monstrous maws.
Is she a bedlam beast desiring to grant devastation,
Upon those who mocked her for a start,
With all the wild begging of her black-heart?

Oh look at her with ebony breath,
Purging the flaxen flesh of devilish death.
Is she a cruel creature who wields her earthly wrath
Upon all who took to hurt with such art,
With the aching echoes of her black-heart?
Wrote this a few minutes ago on a whim.

Read it back to myself and it seems to me as though it's about a young girl who's getting revenge on all the people who bullied her. Or a case of a shy girl finding her assertive nature coming to the fore. Either way works for my interpretation.
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This latest work is also very unique, I have to say. You have the idea to divide the rhyme of septets with a single interception of a non-rhyming line. The Romantics like Shelley and Byron, my most fave poets of that term, would be busy with this. I enjoy this style too, when I have the mood. The subject content is also interesting, and the expression. To look at someone with eyes of ivory rather than with rose colored spects is a unique idea too. I have the feeling that the repetition of some lines is emphatic here. You can correct me if I am wrong. Well-done, as usual. Take a bow downstage.
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kartiksharma Jun 25, 2012  Student General Artist
AMazing Job!♥
Manigran Jun 23, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Powerful work.
Concora Jun 23, 2012   Writer
Excellent imagery, and wonderful characterisation for such a fleeting piece.
AH! The whim - muse set afire! I love it! Aside from the rhyme scheme which is great, I liked the repetitive nature of the 1st, 3rd, 4th, and 5th lines and the 2nd lines starting with: Striking - Maiming - Purging !! Excellent play!
My interpretation is the Black Heart is Mother Earth - and she will, because of us, have her revenge. She will strike and maim and purge the Earth of Man (most of us - re-start the cycle!).
TheOneFallenAngel Jun 22, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
You Know, A Black-Heart Doesn't Make You A Bad Person. :(
ilove-sky Jun 22, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
I love it! And thank you for putting an interpretation, it gives an even fuller body to this already very full poem.
NemoX7 Jun 22, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Thanks. Sometimes I can't really think of what to put in that damn description box. I gave two interpretations since I believed it warranted as such. I wrote this without thinking to be honest, and when I looked back at it again a second before uploading, I thought of what the poem was about. I would say it's theme is about revenge.
ilove-sky Jun 22, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Too much thought can really draw from the creativity, I love that you just write.
NemoX7 Jun 22, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Always have and always will. But I do at times put some thought into my work especially my poetry trilogies, my novel, and other longish poems.
ilove-sky Jun 22, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Yeah, I get that, same here.
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