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Literature
Kylie's Hunger Vlog #7 - Mandy
*Mandy walked into the kitchen, looking rather tired as she opened the fridge. As she wiped her eyes, she noticed that the refrigerator was completely empty; all the food in there from last night was now completely gone.* “Oh dear goodness…why didn’t anyone tell me we were out of food?” Amanda wondered, looking in all the drawers and parts of the fridge. “Well I guess I’ll have to tell Kylie to make an early drive to the store this morning…” She groaned, looking over to the couch where her blonde friend usually slept. *However, when she looked, the couch had no one on it; and the coffee machine on the kitchen counter already had an empty cup of coffee on it.* “Oh phooey, Kylie already left for her early-morning workout…” Mandy stated as she began to put the pieces together. “Well I guess I’ll have to bother Sandra for today until Kylie gets back. I hope the others don’t wake up TOO early today…” *Mandy then walked quietly over to the guest room of their house and silently peeked in
Literature
[1K Watcher Special] Vote For Your Fav Characters
Thank you so much for all the characters submissions in Phase 1! There was exactly 63 submissions and so I added my own (which I will remove should I win) to make it 64 so that its perfect for tournament! Due to the large number of submissions, I have decided to make the 1K Watcher Special Event last longer! Phase 2: Tournament Arc I was perhaps not very clear in my previous post for Phase 2 so I will explain it better here! The Tournament Arc will be divided in two stages: The Group Stages The Knockout Stages Group Stages: The 64 characters have been randomly separated into 16 different groups of four. These groups will be in the form of polls with four characters. You will then vote for your favourite character (only one vote per deviant so be careful!). The character with the most vote in each group will move on to the Knockout Stage. I will post FOUR polls every 24 hours (so fours groups). The winners of each groups will be determined 24 hours after polls have been posted
Literature
Morrisey and Winters: The Black Rose Club, Part 1
Thwack!.... “Mpppphrrrrgg!" The sharply delivered spank was the hardest thus far and thus far there had been a lot. It was stinging enough to force April up onto tip-toes and her toes to scrunch down into the deep, soft shag carpet below. Long gone was any kind of her usual casual state of dress, in a quite literal sense, her curvaceous features within the red lingerie and stockings on show for all in the room, accentuated further by her current predicament. Her body was bent forwards over a spanking horse, wrists bound together and further *to* the horse, forcing her to take a bent over position. Her restraints were simple, completed by a red rubber ball, large enough to fill her mouth, bare her teeth and puff out her cheeks… had they not been cleaved tightly by the leather straps holding the gag in place. It was said gag that was muffling her cries and as the pain from the latest swat to her shapely butt resided she stole herself to take in the room again, to distract herself.
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Something I composed a few days back.
Comments2
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Overall
Vision
Originality
Technique
Impact
I love the "feel" of these stanzas. The questions grow more and more demanding with each line, which gives each one more force than the last. A very potent message; written very well.
Breakdown of my ratings:
4 for Vision. (Let's pretend it stays "Structure.") The rhythm is steady throughout, with a recognizable phrasing with each stanza.
4 for Originality. The theme itself is unique, as well as the imploring tone of the poem.
3 1/2 for Technique. The repeated lines add a nice touch, and defines the whole idea quite nicely. However, I couldn't really recognize a steady rhyming pattern throughout. (But this is excusable since it's free-verse of course!)
5 for Impact. With these elements combined, the poem was very clear in meaning and delivered well.
Thank you for allowing me to review your poem. Overall, a short thought-provoking work that I rather enjoyed.